Italy and romance are practically synonymous in pop culture, but don’t go planning your wedding just yet; getting involved with someone from Italy or of strong Italian heritage can lead to confusion and frustration to someone unfamiliar with their culture.  sunset_couple_walk_243076_lGondola rides, opera, and sexy accents are all very well and good, but if you aren’t willing to compromise on some matters, you may find yourself trapped in a rocky relationship filled with heartache.  Here are a few of the chief conflict points to look out for:

  1. Gender Roles.  Coming from a country steeped in tradition, Italians may treat men and women as having starkly diverging roles in both the relationship and the household.  As a woman, even if you are highly educated, your male partner may view you primarily as a wife, mother, and housekeeper.  You will be responsible for all cooking and cleaning, just as your partner will pride himself in being the sole provider of the household.  Similarly, if you’re involved with an Italian woman, she may expect you to place her on a pedestal and lavish her with gifts, as that’s what she’s most likely used to.
  2. The Whole Mama’s Boy Thing.  If you want to date an Italian man, you will have to accept the fact that you’ll always be a substitute for his mother.  Italian mothers tend to smother their sons with care and affection, often resulting in very clingy and spoiled men.  Be prepared to have your cooking, your cleaning, and your unconditional love pale in comparison to hers.
  3. Excessive Arrogance About Their Love-Making Skills.  Italy has a very macho culture, and the men generally view themselves as a breed of Casanovas.  While they may talk a very big game, boasting loud and often about their prowess in the bedroom, keep in mind that it’s all bravado.besar-pares-romantico-vector-relacion_21-30067746
  4. Overt Demonstration of Emotions.  Coming from a very loud and expressive culture, your Italian paramour may see it as normal to communicate their affections or dissatisfactions very passionately, rather than let their feelings quietly simmer for months or even years.  If heartfelt talks, raging quarrels, or public displays of affection are not your cup of tea, then you may wish to reconsider this relationship.
  5. Your Partner Will Get Jealous.  Unlike more gender-egalitarian societies where men and women spending time together as friends is viewed as a common and even wholesome pastime, your Italian partner may view it as breeding grounds for adultery.  You may have to put up with possessiveness and accusations from your partner if you’re caught in the company of someone of the opposite gender.

If you feel you have the stamina and patience to see your relationship through with someone with an Italian background, you’re sure to find yourself with a new family opening you with open arms.  Impress them all by showing up to family gatherings with a firm grasp of the Italian language.  Send us an inquiry for more information or taking a look at our Italian courses to get started learning right away.